Mother’s Day is a painful day for many women because it’s a reminder of what they’ve lost – the future that they should have had with their precious child, or maybe they wished for a child but could never conceive. The traditional Mother’s Day is a struggle, seeing all those mums celebrated for having their children live.
I myself am a bereaved mother. I often wonder what our lives would have been like with six children, instead of two. I spent so many hours daydreaming and crying, wishing things would have been different. I love my life now and will always think of my gorgeous children that I hold in my heart, alongside the ones that I hold in my arms.
International Bereaved Mother’s Day
In 2010, International Bereaved Mother’s Day was born. It’s the first Sunday in May (the week before Mother’s Day in Australia)
This is a day that recognizes mums who have tried so hard to have children, those who have had miscarriages, stillbirths, neonatal deaths, terminal illness, or accidental death.
Celebrating grieving mums
Let’s celebrate grieving mums in a gentle way every day. Living without your child in your life is a tough one.
What you can do to support a grieving mum?
- Let her know that she’ll always be a mum to her precious child or children.
- Buy her flowers.
- Send a card and write her child, or children’s name in.
- Take her for coffee or a lunch date.
- Bake her favourite dessert.
- Create an artwork.
- Help her out in the kitchen.
- Share memories of her child or children.
- Look at photos together.
- Allow her just to be wherever she’s at.
These things don’t have to be done only on International Bereaved Mother’s Day. They can be done at any time. Talk to the grieving mum and see what she’d like to do. She might want to spend the day alone. Just let her know you’re thinking of her, and it’s okay to grieve – it’s okay not to be okay.
I hope you spend a lovely International Bereaved Mother’s Day remembering your child.