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The Value of RUOK Day

Do you know the value of asking someone or even yourself RUOK? This year RUOK day is concentrating on asking, “Are you really, ok?”

It’s important to ask, “Are you really, ok?” because there are people who feel that they don’t want to bother others with their problems. They don’t want to overwhelm family or friends because they’re already dealing with their own problems and, don’t want to add to their stress. What I hear clients say the most is, “I’m a private person, I don’t think that’s anyone else’s business.”

Are you really, ok?

Here are some statements that you might have heard or said yourself:

“I’m scared they won’t be my friend anymore”

“I don’t want them to know my business”

“I don’t want them to think less of me”

“I don’t want them to look at me differently”

“It’s too hard to talk to someone about this”

“It’s too big and people won’t know what to do”

“I can’t tell anyone because they’ll think I’m weak”

“I don’t want to cry in front of them because I don’t think I’ll stop and they won’t         understand what I’m saying”

“I don’t want them to see me like this”

“I’ve always done it myself, I don’t need anybody’s help”

These statements might be familiar to you. I encourage you to talk to your friends about the difficulties you’re going through, it usually creates a sharing of stories and moves your relationship closer.

 

We’re wired to connect

Know this, (that sounds like a bit of tough talk, hey?) everyone goes through tough times in life and needs support from family and friends from time to time. Know that you matter in this life, you impact others, you are loved and you are worth sharing your story of love and loss. You deserve to share your story of your grief, sometimes it can unfold a conversation that brings you closer to someone.

 

Are you really, okay?

Grief impacts your life forever. Before you ask someone else, “Are you really, ok?” Ask the same of yourself because, grief is difficult to talk about. Because your grief is unique to you. No one else feels the same as you, sharing your grief experience can feel excruciating and make you feel vulnerable. Any or all of the above thoughts may be filling your head, which makes you even less likely to share your story of grief.

 

Check in with yourself

Ask yourself these quick questions:

  • Am I having enough sleep?
  • Am I staying connected with people who support me?
  • Am I still moving or exercising to keep healthy?
  • Am I eating nutritiously?
  • Am I doing things that are fun?
  • Am I laughing?
  • Have I let anything go that helps me stay healthy in body, mind and spirit?

 

What you can do now

If you feel that after answering these questions that you’re not ok, it’s time for you to ask for support and let someone know your grief story. Sometimes you need a little guidance or just a chat with someone who’s sensitive to your needs. Talking may relieve the stress you’re going through and help you feel more connected.

 

The wrap

RUOK Day is all about having a talk about your mental health and making sure that we are all going ok in this challenging world we live in. It gives us a chance to know how important talking about our mental health is and how it brings us closer to each other.

Today isn’t the only day you can ask yourself these questions. You can do it every day and journal your feelings because journaling is beneficial in so many ways.

It’s also a critical time to check in with yourself and see if you’re ok. Do this first to see if you want to answer someone who asks, “Are you really, ok?”

Let me know, “Are you really, ok?” cait@juliea67.sg-host.com